How to Set-Up the Conversation
Discussing concerns you have about autism with families is important. You can support families in recognizing the signs by using the following process.
- First, point out signs of autism using “I wonder” statements. “I wonder why he stays focused on his cars and doesn’t notice that you’re building a garage.”
- Make connections between the signs and the child’s learning. “I wonder if focusing only on his cars makes it hard for him to learn new play ideas from you.”
- Wait for the caregiver to ask why. This is a sign that the caregiver may be ready to hear your opinion and advice.
- Connect the sign to the word “autism.” “Focusing on objects more than people is one potential sign of autism.”
- Acknowledge the caregiver’s opinions and beliefs. “You’re right, he does love cars! He’s doing a great job of making the driving noise as he plays with them. And we’ve both noticed that he has a hard time paying attention to other people while he plays with them.
- Allow yourself to be vulnerable. “I might be wrong, but I want to make sure we aren’t missing anything that could prevent his progress.”
- Continue the conversation. Conducting a screener, such as the Screening Tool for Autism in Toddlers and Young Children (STAT), can help you discuss additional signs and prepare the parent for a later evaluation.
Guiding Principles
- Be honest and direct. Use the word “autism” and give specific examples of what you’re seeing.
- Give wait time. Allow the caregiver to process each statement
- Seek input. Ask how what you’re seeing compares to the child in their daily life
- Practice active listening. Seek understanding by asking open-ended questions. Your job is to be honest about your concerns, not to convince the caregiver.
- Be compassionate. Respond to the caregiver’s feelings by reflecting rather than trying to fix. Make comments such as “I can imagine…” rather than, “Everything will be ok.”
- Use help-giving strategies. Highlight the caregiver’s strengths and help them identify their own concerns and needs
